The Hardest Working Band in Show Business
In mid 1978, Jonny
Hibbert, Henry Hibbert, and Robert Schmidt left the band, to be replaced
by Guy Goodman, Marvin Jackson (another HaHavishnu refugee), and Steve
Pace, formerly of Capricorn recording artist “Hydra” and later of “Krokus.”
This ensemble lasted for a while.
Steve Pace quit and
was replaced by Tony Garstin, Charles Wolfe (drummer for The ("Money Changes
Everything") Brains), Darryl Rhoades himself, and Mark Bishop. Jackson
left the band and was replaced by Edward’s HaHavishnu replacement Michael
Colford. By January 1980 the band consisted of what many fans believe
to be the "real" Cruis-O-Matic: Jason “Opie” Keene on bass, Bob “Leo
Sagittarius” Cunningham on guitar, Blair “Jesse Presley” Tanner on Farfisa
and Vox organ and guitar, Mark Bishop on drums, and Edward "Mr. Vegas"
Tanner on guitar.
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"Mr. Vegas" and Cruis-O-Matic entertain guests
of The Windjammer, Charleston, South Carolina.
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Mr. Vegas pays homage to his idol Michael
Jackson.
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Mr. Leo Sagittarius (aka Bob Cunningham)
flanked by Cruis-O-Matic single
(Time Won't Let Me -- Summertime Blues)
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This incarnation played
on the average of 200 shows per year from January 1980 until December 31,
1984. This was the “funny” Cruis-O-Matic: Blair, an excellent
break dancer and wry humorist, wore leisure suits and Barney Fife outfits;
Opie, normally the butt of on-stage band jokes, sported a carrot-red flat
top; Mark played drum solos in the audience. During this period,
the band adopted The Ancestors’ approach of toying with the audience, but,
because of the times, or because the Tanners had gotten better at it, this
time the result was not contempt, but widespread popularity.
Although primarily
an oldies band, Cruis-O-Matic rarely played songs by The Beatles or Rolling Stones,
never any beach music, almost no soul music, and virtually no songs by
any bands who had more than one or two hits. The band’s stock in
trade was doing songs by The Standells, Music Machine, Music Explosion,
Syndicate of Sound, Balloon Farm, Blues Magoos, Tremeloes, Searchers, and
a whole lot of instrumentals, ranging from a psychedelic version of “Wildwood
Flower” to faux polka instrumentals, which they performed under the moniker
“The Sons of Hitler -- those bad boys from Bavaria.” The band spread
rumors about itself: they were from Las Vegas; Blair was Elvis’s
twin brother who had long been believed dead at birth; Opie had done time
in prison; members of the band were all fraternity alums from various universities;
various band members suffered from heroin addiction.
Kids loved the band
because the band members were basically clean but irreverent, and oldsters
loved the repertoire, which consisted of 99% sixties tunes. The band
was represented by Hit Attractions which, up until that time, traded only
in bands like The Tams and The Swingin’ Medallions. Consistent
with their skewed sense of entertainment, the band refused to submit standard
promo photos to their agents and nightclubs. Instead they created
silly pictures of dogs’ heads on human bodies, superimposed on a butcher’s
meat cutting chart, Elvis heads on obese female and Superman torsos, Mexican
frog musicians, gangs of Shriners on mini motorcycles, and other blatant
attempts at getting attention.
Fraternity guys loved
the band, largely because their dates hated the band. Cruis-O-Matic
did not take requests. They played too loud (legendary performer
Bruce Hampton pronounced them the loudest thing he had ever heard) and
mercilessly harassed their fans -- especially the female ones. Several
fraternities hired the band solely on word-of-mouth, intrigued by hearing
of the band’s country version of “Purple Haze,” for example. One
grown-up guy paid the band in excess of two thousand dollars to play a
small private party, because he had heard that the band played the long
version of “In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida.”
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